|
LIFE'S EXCESSES
by
Christine Hargan, BSc (Hons)
Psychology, based in Spain
www.whatsholdingyouback.biz
|
A moderate addiction may not always
be hurtful; but when taken in excess it is nearly always
bad for the health.
There are lots of ideas and theories on why, some people
have issues with excesses and others do not. People who
succeed in life have confidence, and those who do not,
make tentative attempts, its like they are not really
expecting to succeed, so they need to reward, or punish
themselves – people who have problems with excess,
whether it is food, alcohol, cigarettes, medication, or
another substance generally have one thing in common.
The substance misused is a quick fix and avoids
resolving the issue at the root of their problem.
For the obese - food becomes their focus…. It’s a reward
used to make them feel better – the trouble is, they eat
to make themselves feel better a quick fix but the
result is they become fatter so their body image
deteriorates and the lower their self esteem because
they (and even worse others) view them as weak – so the
problem self-perpetuates…. Ever heard of the term
spiralling out of control?
The obese person may join a slimming group and lose lots
of weight…. They are gaining motivation from other
people through shame and reward – I wonder where they
first experienced that? They are ashamed if they have
not lost weight at the weekly weigh in, and are rewarded
by praise and awards if they have…… but as soon as the
target weight is reached and they leave the support
(discipline) of the group….. the behaviour returns…..
something makes them feel bad, incompetent or whatever
the trigger is and the original behaviour returns…..
Does this sound familiar?….
This is true for people with dependency on all kinds of
things…. The problem could be anything from a long
forgotten unresolved child-hood issue, through to
something went wrong during the day, but what most of
them seem to have in common is that they have been
conditioned to self-regulate…. They have been taught to
reward themselves and shame has been used as a
punishment. ….
The way the mind works is on two levels, that, that you
need to know to function –and the things that you know
automatically. All of the issues surrounding an excess,
or compulsion are locked into automatic behaviour and
have a trigger. The trouble is that the sufferer and
their families are too close to recognise the spiral of
behaviour, because their response is automatic. The key
is to recognise what is happening; once that hurdle is
crossed, a solution can be found. And often the solution
is unexpected.
Confidence is the hinge on the door to success
|
|
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
|
Christine Hargan, BSc (Hons) Psychology; Specialises in
and treats the causes and effects of emotional
disorders, confidence and addiction based issues with
hypnotherapy, NLP and psychotherapy. |
|